I Don’t Want To Live My Life Online

I Don’t Want To Live My Life Online

I’ve had a serious lack of motivation lately. I’ve been getting hung up on my content only being ‘meaningful’ or ‘useful.’ You’re probably thinking that my content is neither of those things but hey ho. But as a result I’ve not really written anything. My drafts are full of half written posts that I don’t really feel anything for and I’ve begun to think about my blog a little differently.

For the past 11 months I’ve been pouring my heart out on my blog and social media. And whilst I’ve loved sharing aspects of my life, uni career, mental health and relationship with you, I’ve recently been thinking about taking a step back. Not a step back from blogging, but a step back from blogging about me.

This might seem like an odd way to go. Lots of people go from an anonymous blog to letting everyone know who they are. And by no means am I becoming anonymous. I’d just like to make No Space For Milk the blog I wanted to make it in the first place, which was a place to help people, to address mental health issues head on.

There’s a lot of pressure on bloggers to be a certain way, to cultivate Instagram into a theme, to write in a certain style, take photos in a specific way and in all honesty, that’s just not me.

I’m not a marble background girl at all. And photography does not come naturally to me. I don’t even enjoy taking photographs of still objects. I like photographs of people and animals and nature. I don’t like endorsing products really. I hate the idea of making people feel that they need to have something to complete themselves. Obviously I’m not saying that any of these things are bad, they’re just not who I am.

Right now, I feel like I’m living online, spending most of my time checking social media rather than interacting and engaging. But that hasn’t just come about because of blogging. It’s been there for the last, god knows, 10 years? It started when getting home from school meant sitting in front of the computer until bedtime, instead of doing things.

My Instagram and Twitter accounts look as though I’m always at the gym or reading or with friends or out for coffee, but in reality, I’m more than likely starting at a screen, scrolling up and down my never-ending Twitter timeline, living in a parallel universe.

It feels like I’ve lost that lust for learning, for wanting to better myself. I don’t want to live my life online as much as I have been doing.

So I think what I’m trying to say is that I’ll be keeping my personal life to my diary more than online now. I want to be the person I portray myself to be on social media, rather than spending my time cultivating that image of me.

Rachel x-x-x

 

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4 Comments

  1. March 2, 2017 / 9:41 pm

    Really insightful and great thoughts. It is often as we evolve as a race , advances come along and we adapt to it. We are in the process of adapting to online/ Social media existence (or lack of it). With great mind like yours and other great ladies , I am sure we will find the right balance. I have reviewed ladies who have put great thoughts in their blogs in 2016, and one post was around the same context as your post here: my review post link

    https://beyo11.wordpress.com/2017/02/26/bright-starstop-10-blogs-with-some-difference

  2. March 3, 2017 / 1:44 am

    I so love your thoughts on this! I think it’s definitely good to find a balance of time online and in person. In the end, I have to remind myself that time on earth in person will be the moments we will most likely remember the most!
    Caitlin

  3. March 5, 2017 / 10:36 pm

    I can identify with a lot of this. I’ve experimented with changing the nature of my blog a lot over the years. The most recent/current iteration is perhaps the least connected to “me” of all the iterations so far, which quite bizarrely allows a level of freedom I have never had before. Will be interesting to see what you decide to do going forwards.

  4. March 16, 2017 / 3:25 pm

    I can completely relate to this post. Funnily enough, I had taken a few weeks off myself just to get my motivation back. When I did, I realised there were quite a few bloggers who were experiencing the same. I guess the pressure of posting something gets to one in the end and it becomes more of a chore rather than a fun blog. But I am starting to enjoy it once again and it feels good to be back. Just follow your heart 🙂 ….. ps: just followed you on Instagram …

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