Writing a wedding post feels bizarre to say the least. It’s weird enough that I’m engaged (it’s been nine months and it stills feels odd) but I’m actually planning a wedding that’s taking place next year.
It’s been almost eight years since I told my Mum that when I went to university I was going there single. I’d recently split up with an ex-boyfriend and being that nerd that I was (still am), I was thoroughly looking forward to spending the next four years utterly absorbed in my studies. It was less than a few months after this that I met my boyfriend and almost eight years later we’re engaged to be married in June.
I love pretty dresses and getting dolled up but being a bride? Not for me. I’d never dreamed of a white wedding or a puffy dress. I’d never thought about the venue or who would be invited. Admittedly, the little part of me that thought one day I might get married, had thought about the food, because isn’t that the most important part anyway? But overall weddings really hadn’t crossed my mind.
So when I got engaged I didn’t really know what to do. I’d wanted to be engaged for a long time. I wanted to feel like my fiancé and I were at the next step but then what happens?
The truth is, when you get engaged, everyone has an opinion. They ask you the date, what you’ll be wearing, who you’re inviting and even what flowers you’re having. The last question seems bizarre to me because honestly I don’t even know what different flowers look like, aside from the obvious ones. Every single time you see a family member or someone who knows you’re getting married, you’re asked how far planning has come. And, I understand, of course I do. Getting married is important, the wedding day is important but so is the rest of the life part that comes afterwards.
If you’ve just read the last few paragraphs and wondered whether I’m actually excited for the wedding, I am, don’t worry! I’m just still a little confused that people have opinions on centrepieces.
I always put the idea of being a bride on a pedestal. I thought it was something very specific that had to be done a certain way but now I’m planning my own wedding I’m starting to see that being a bride is whatever you want it to be. People around you will absolutely want to stick their oar in and tell you what you should be doing and that that’s not what’s traditional. Truthfully, I don’t feel well equipped to be giving wedding advice, but if there’s one thing I can say, it’s stick to your guns, do what you both want and most importantly, if people care that your flowers are plastic, they aren’t people worth caring about.
I’m planning some more, far less cynical posts about wedding planning soon so let me know if you like that kind of thing!